hello! Yes, i am still alive. alive and well! I've forgotten about being a blogger though, probably due to exams and such. but life is so good.
man, i always have these epiphanys late at night! so (once again) please excuse that which may not be entirely coherent.
lol, as my links aren't working, i cant' comment on the blogs i read just now (Shannon's and Jess L's)... so i'll say it on here, girls!
Shay: i love love love your heart. and the whole sitting IN prayer, not merely throwing up requests is so beautiful, and exactly what i need to be doing as well. may there be so many blessings for you that come with that!
Jess: Yah, i hear yah when it comes to talking about boys and marriage and relationships. dude, it's hard. it's so easy to just sit and talk about boys. which, as you said, is healthy :) but where's the line? i honestly don't know. but these guys are our brothers, precious to us and to the body of Christ. it robs them of true value and honour when we see them only as "potentials" (not that you do this, just rambling :) ) but yah, once again, thanks for your wisdom and i love how you put the Bible right into your blogs! yay!
gosh, Bible this past week and a half has truely been a blessing. except i know i need to throw out an appology to all those in my bible class, especially those who were making presentations when i was being distracted. i've been blown away by people in CHRP recently! i LOVED everyone's project for 2 reason: 1) most of them were truly from the heart and so full of wisdom and truth and, 2) it gave me a chance to see so many of my friends in a vulnerable position and totally do an amazing job at what they did. so thanks all you in Bible! i love you guys!
it's crazy, there were so many topics discussed in Bible... Worship, ghosts, halloween, Gandhi, desensitization, the poor, astrology, love, music, beauty, fashion, ... the list goes on! And i have walked away from the presentations so full of questions and such a desire to seek truth. everyone did an amazing job of looking into the Word for God's answers, but sometimes things just aren't answered. and it totally got me to thinking about WHY i get frustrated sometimes when i don't know answers to things, especially "spiritual" things. like, sometimes I just want Jesus to be black and white, with an opinion on everything, with a "right" path for my life, with absolute truths. And i need to totally repent for that... that's me putting Christ in a box. something i HATE to have happen to me... and something that totally takes away from the mystery, holiness, and wisdom of Yahweh. brutal...
another thing God's shown me about my life is: ME. everything i do is about me. seriously, everything, from giving money to help others to worship to school to relationships. i sacrifice time, money, means, etc, for ME. not intentionally, but the things i do i do in hopes to make me feel better. make me more comfortable. Oh Jesus, throw a different card at me! force me out of my gluttonous, pleasure living life! and gah, see, that's for me too! i need a serious humility lesson. and thankfully, we've got the best Teacher. reminds me of Phil 2...
"Do nothing out of selfish ambition or vain conceit, but in humility consider others better than yourself. Each of you should look not only to your own interest, but also to the interests of others. Your attitude should be that of Christ Jesus: Who, in very nature God, did not consider equality with God something to be grasped, but made Himself nothing, taking the very nature of a servant..." (and on... it's so good, read it! :) )
wow... yes Lord. and so, as mentioned in that passage, i know that I AM important and i am the temple of the living, mighty God, and so how i care for my self and think of myself is crucial, but at the same time, there's that whole "If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself, take up his cross, and follow Me" verse as well. DENY myself. what is that really? whatever it is, i know i want to do it. every single day! every moment. i GOTTA walk the talk. man, totally! where is the love? mine is very teeny tiny and pretty conditional. and i think so much of being a follower of Christ is suffering for him, but i'm waaaaaay to comfy cozy to experience any of that. sweet pickles, i need Him bad!
"What, then, shall we say in response to this? If God is for us, who, WHO can be against us?" (Romans 8:31).
Janellio-yo-ho-wiggedy-whack-smack-pitter-pat-gotta-go