Early this morning--like early early... maybe 2:30 or so--I was just settling in to bed after a rowdy night of fun new year's action. As I turned over to grab my bible, I remember thinking about some of the past conversations that I have had with friends, just sorting through my heart and all the questions that I have come upon. I have been reading in John, but last night I wanting something a bit different. Here's how the conversation went (one that, I'll admit, seems like I had with myself, but it could definitely have been God... I really never can recognize His voice because it sounds a lot like, well, mine.)

Janelle: Hmm, where should I read? I want some good ol' truth.
God(?) : Does it matter? Isn't the entire Bible truth?
Janelle: Uhh... yes.
God: Do you trust me?
Janelle: Uhh... yes.
God: Read Chronicles. 16. 2nd Chronicles 16.
Janelle: Uhh... ok.

So I read it. And FRICK it was just what I needed. JUST what I needed. The thing that struck me the most was verse 9: "For the eyes of the LORD range throughout the earth to strengthen those whose hearts are fully committed to him."

I long to be found as one who is fully committed to the Lord. Despite my doubts, and lack of faith and insecurities in Christ, I want to be found undivided in my committment to Him. The eyes of the Lord wander to and fro, looking for the faithful. And when they are found He gives them strength. I think I need to toss aside my intellect and spend a season chasing Jesus in blind faith. That has a negative connotation to it, but... where is my child-like devotion? My unhindered faith. I have let the reason, intellect, and critical thought of this world--all aspects which have their time and place, even in the faith--crush the simplicity of belief. May it never be so again.